Emeriti Exile: 338-348 CE

Emeriti Exile: 338-348 CE
Exile: 338-348 CE, Thassos, Greece

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

10: BHI Extreme Garden Products


BHI Develops Garden Gnome Hunter and Anti-Deer Robots


BHI Anti-Garden Gnome Robot™ 1.0 
BHI Anti-Deer Garden Robot™ 1.0                

The BHI Anti-Garden Gnome Hunter™ (When Garden Gnomes Overwhelm the Garden):

LEVERETT—The BHI Center for the Elimination of Garden Clutter announced today that a new line of Garden Gnome stalking robots has been developed at the BHI Garden Robotics Laboratory, deep in the Leverett woods amongst the decaying Cedar Sawdust Dunes.  The BHI Anti-Garden Gnome Robot™ is equipped with a stone chisel and mallet to scare away encroaching Gnomes and to encourage current residents to seek work as Spokes Gnomes for Travelocity™.  It is equipped with stealth technology and is silent when executing its mission.  
                             
The BHI Anti-Deer Garden Robot™ (When Artemisia and Perovskia are not enough):


LEVERETT—BHI Director, HC Davis announced the release of the Anti-Deer Garden Robot™, equipped with BHI Sense-around Sonar™, and advanced Paint Ball technology.  The Anti-Deer Garden Robot™ employs genuine compact Bose Speakers™ to broadcast the sound of a shotgun blast in three different settings: “Outrageous,” “Deafening,” and “Catastrophic.”

The BHI Center for Advanced Flight Response Science (a hallmark of Emeriti persistence throughout the Centuries), has designed the Robotic protocols to maximize Fright and Flight effectiveness.  The Robotic sensors employ night vision technology coupled with infrared spectrum analysis that discriminates between foraging Deer and people who may act like foraging Deer.

Both BHI Robots may be purchased directly from BHI.  Batteries may be charged using the patented BHI Solar Scare Crow™ unit ($577.36 each).  The Robots have an effective range of 1,000’ (305 m), and can travel at a normal pace of 2.5- 3.0 miles per hour (4.8 km/hr).
Price:  $1,235.95

Products of the Emeriti Brotherhood ©2013