Staff Saver™ Helmets
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| Model PH-A: Light Duty Retreat Hat |
The BHI Neurotrauma Science Lab has designed and tested
protective Staff Saver™ Helmets to
guard against inadvertent self-inflicted neural insult trauma resulting from palm to forehead collisions when people say silly things in staff
meetings.
PH-A Staff Saver™ I Model: provides
gentle inconspicuous protection during program retreats typically set in casual
surroundings. The brim prevents forehead contact with tables and walls,
while interior padding lessens shock trauma. Blue, Dark Green, Black, and
Putty: $150 each.
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| Model PH-B: Medium Duty Curriculum Review Meetings |
PH-B Staff
Saver™ II Model: provides a higher degree of protection required of Curriculum
meetings or reappointment reviews. The Uni-sex design features a discreet
brim that guards against table, wall or palm impacts and is equipped with air
vents for comfort. It incorporates
significant frontal lobe protection. Navy/Black and Black/Tan: $250 each.
Scientists at the BHI Neurotrauma Science Testing Lab assess multi-positional blunt force outcomes to ensure proper protection
for all Staff Saver™ products, at various levels of force. All Staff Saver™helmets
have been field-tested and provide a 10-year warranty. (Does not apply to the untenured).
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| Model PH-D: Maximum Duty for University Reorganization Meetings |
PH-D Staff Saver™ Max III Model: provides maximum protection required for rigorous reactionary academic meetings that typically push participants to numerous mind numbing brinks. This exceptional helmet is equipped with its own oxygen supply and features surround sound speakers and an iPod connection port. The helmet affords maximum protection from both self-inflicted and externally inflicted compressive insults that might prove damaging to the cerebral cortex. Unisex Black (for evening wear): $1,850 each.
Products of the Brotherhood of the Emeriti ©2013
